Thanksday #34

I've been sitting here for almost 30 minutes staring at the screen and trying to string together a coherent sentence to kick-start this week's day o' thanks with the right tone. I was aiming for light, upbeat and funny. But y'all...I got nothin'. I'm feeling lethargic, cloudy and unamusing. The words "I'm so tired" are too diluted to really convey the level of emptiness I feel deep in my bones. I do understand the term "bone tired" now. My marrow is exhausted.

(This is the point where I should probably have a prize for the one person who sticks it out for the rest of this post and reads it until the bitter, bitter end.)

(Actually, this would be a good time to pause...get some coffee...and regroup. One moment please.)

--

Okay, so it's hours and hours later and that didn't help much. But I'm determined to be joyful and thankful, marrow be darned!

1) This coffee mug, which is now my go-to mug every morning. I've literally grabbed it out of the dirty dishwasher twice this week and washed it by hand so I could use it. And that it was sent to me by one of my college girls makes it even sweeter.

2) Back-and-forth commenting on Facebook that only I and my friend know the meaning of, and laughing out loud on the couch while your husband looks at you like you're a crazy person.

3) Gym time. Twice this week! Take that, frozen M & M's and Cheeze-Its! And alooooooooha, MAUI.

4) This video. Because it makes me laugh until I cry. And because I love watching how much he adores his big sister, and how no one can make him laugh like she can.

5) The first day of 2nd grade. And this sassy, posing, adorable little 2nd grader. She thinks she so big time now that she's in 2nd grade. So much so that she decided she wanted the book bag you see here instead of a back pack. I feel like we just moved up here and she was in kindergarten with a backpack and minus about 6 inches. How has it been two years? And why aren't her kneecaps bruised from growing so much so fast?

6) Me time. I've been sorely, sorely lacking in the Me Time department. I haven't made quiet time or running time or just alone time in general a priority at all this entire summer. And you know what? I hit the wall this week. One final straw landed gently upon my back, falling slowly and slowly from about 30,000 feet...but once I felt its whisper, I exploded. I had to get away and get alone.

The blessing in all this is that was what it took to get me back into the gym (and where #3 above came in). And also, when Greg got home and I exploded explained about the haystack on my back, he gave me the gift of taking of everything with the kids for the night while I went to the gym to bale some hay. And then I went to the grocery store. And got gas. 'Cuz I just needed more time to be alone. Had there been a 24-hour Wal-Mart in the immediate vicinity, I would have perused those aisles for hours and hours and hours.

A few mornings later I woke up early and read my Bible. Then later went to the gym. Again. I'm feeling like me all over again.

Ahhhh. Welcome back, me. You've been missed.

7) A decision. There's something I've been wanting to do for years. And I sorta-kinda tried it a few years ago, and things turned out the way I thought they would (not the way I wanted them to), so I took it as a sign from God it wasn't meant to be. So I shelved the idea. I even stopped praying about it. But it was always there, lurking and taunting me.

Recently it's been up in my face again, so I started asking for handwriting-on-the-wall-huge-confirmation from God that it's what I'm supposed to do. And I've sorta-kinda been praying about it again. But this week I had a sudden epiphany: what if God didn't want to send handwriting-on-the-wall-huge-confirmation? What if, instead, all these little things that have happened are whispers-in-the-ear-tap-on-the-shoulder confirmations? And because He's God, He is free to send confirmations however He dern well pleases? And that if it doesn't look how I want it to, that's my problem, not His? (And I'm fairly certain He'd say dern, at least to me.)

All that to say...I've decided to move forward with this years-old desire. And if it is a God thing, I'm trusting it will happen. And if it's not, I'm trusting He'll stop me before I get carried away with myself. (At least, that's my deepest prayer.) I hate to be a tease, but I'm not ready to say anything about it yet. But if it comes to fruition, then you'll know eventually. 'Cuz I'm too much of an open book and just can't help myself.

8) A good soup recipe. Greg can't understand why I like to make soups this time of year (or any, really).

"It's summer! Who eats soup in the summer? It's so hot!" 

To which I reply with,

"That is the most ridiculous theory ever. Because if you're going to apply that theory to soup, then you have to apply it to all hot, cooked food. No burgers, no BBQ, no pasta. So you're gonna dish up that soup, and you're gonna like it! DERNIT!"

This weeks vegetable soup was wonderful, if I do say so alone myself.

9) Ross (the store). Got me a pair of black shorts and black pants all for $17. I don't need to expand. You totally get that.

10) Advil. Because nothing (NOTHING!) can get rid of a killer headache like four Advil can. And in 30 minutes or less. Take that, Dominos.

Your turn! Let me know what you're thankful for this week and share the love. Leave a comment below or link up with Candra. It'll bring life into your weary bones. I'm serious!

p.s. The Gungor CD Giveway ends tonight! Be sure to enter my first giveaway! The new album can be yours free a full month before its release. Enter by midnight!